Love/Hate

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about eating, and health, and exercise, and I’ve come to a real revelation in my way of thinking. It’s a pretty simple idea. What it comes down to is: love myself. Because, though so many of the typical diet behaviors are ostensibly aimed at making one feel better, look better, etc., they also often come from a place of evil self-hatred and self-destruction. Thankfully, I think I’ve figured out some great behaviors that are equally helpful, but which come from a place of love. (The trick, now, is to actually do them.)

Here’s a handy-dandy list to explain what I’m talking about:

• Hatred = Eating fake over-processed food (fat-free cream cheese or artificial sweetners come to mind). Love = Eating smaller quantities of the really good stuff (brown sugar, heavy cream).
  
• Hatred = Taking pills (Alli) that keep you from digesting fat, but also keep you from processing vitamins. Love = Taking your vitamins.
  
• Hatred = Avoiding bananas, avocadoes, potatoes, etc. because they have “too many calories.” Love = Eating a variety of fruits and vegetables every day, knowing they have nutritional value that trumps nearly anything else.
  
• Hatred = Beating yourself up when you over-indulge. Love = Accepting that, in a human life, there are ups and downs.
  
• Hatred (or not enough Love, anyway) = Eating whatever is available, all the time, because I don’t feel I’m worth the trouble to cook something healthy. Love = Making food daily from fresh, simple ingredients.
  
• Hatred = Getting down about barely fitting into airplane seats on a recent trip. Love = ?? I still haven’t figured out how to process that, exactly, except maybe to keep my chin up. Or become an activist and push for larger seats. In truth, I want to exercise and eat right so this doesn’t remain an issue.
  

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Meanwhile moving (and pregnancy) progresses. We are this close to booking a mover, and a car mover. We have a new place (can’t remember if I mentioned that bit). We found a day care (Halleluia!) for the boy that we like, and that actually has openings. We are setting things up for packing, and for fixing up the house a slight bit, before we go. We still need to set a date, and book flights, for actually leaving ourselves, but it is really coming along. I totally can’t wait, especially considering the new, regular chorus of “daddy, daddy!” that the boy sings out at regular intervals. He misses his daddy so much. So do I.